Be Careful What You Wish For

I've been wanting to move back east for so long that now that the possiblity is there, I don't know what to think. Just a brief synopsis of the discussions I've been having in my head: Have I gotten too soft for the humidity? But oh how nice it would be to have longer seasons and milder winters. Is it wrong to take my children away from one set of relatives to be closer to another? Yet I miss my parents and my extended family so much, and it only seems fair that we spend some of our lives in both places. Would Dave go for it?  I have assured him that if he can find a job that supports us, I'll gladly stay here.  How would we sell our house?  If it was meant to be, it will all work out. Really I don't need to be worrying about these things yet, because I haven't received any job offers.  Yet my mind won't turn off and continues to explore every possiblity.

Don't get me wrong, the idea of being close to family, trees, southern tradition and history seems almost to good to be true.  But somehow even the thought of leaving is causing me more angst than I would have expected.  I suppose when you make your life in any place the thought of leaving friends & family and familiarities fills anyone with a fair amount of dread.

It's been a long time since I blogged so let me back up.  In August, we learned that our department was not allowing any flexibility with the new legislative mandated schedule and that means 5, 8 hour days a week and a 1/2 hour lunch.  I'm sure to the rest of you full-timers that doesn't seem to be that big of a deal, but for me it was the last straw.  The flexibility of my job up until now has allowed me to balance a career and parenting, making a full-time job and raising small children bearable.  But the idea of spending that many more hours away from my kids a week and one more day commuting got me thinking about what other options I have. And honestly I am totally fed up with the politics of it all - being caught in the middle of a power struggle between the governor and the legislature made me reconsider my state employee status and how much (or little in this case) we're valued. Besides, jobs generally pay better back east and they're more plentiful in dietetics.  So I started looking and applied for a couple of jobs within a 3 hour drive from my parent's house.  Rally call you Richmonders if you want me closer, you'll have to find me a full-time job in something public health or pediatric nutrition related:)

Who knows where we'll be in 6 months.  We could be in Fayetteville, North Carolina (my 1st pick of the jobs I've applied for so far - I have an interview next week!), Smyth County or Alexendria, Virginia or even Rifle, Colorado (possible job opportunity for Dave there).  Then again, maybe we'll move to Bountiful so the commute won't be such a big deal.  I change my mind daily about what I think the best thing is for our family.  The only thing that I know for sure is that something has to give. Of course it's hard to make concrete decisions or get firm answers yet - we'll see what the job offers bring.

Stay tuned - I'm hoping we have a clearer direction if not destination by December.  In the meantime, I'll be satisfied if my mind can slow down enough to let me sleep at night.